Can Love Ever Come After Commitment?

From the time women are little girls, they’re sold a certain picture of how things are supposed to go down when they eventually do partner up later in life. All the social scripts say that one day you’ll meet your perfect soulmate, and it will feel just like being struck by a bolt from the blue. Then you’ll commit to each other in absolute certainty that you’re doing the right thing before living happily ever after.

And, sure – if you’re extremely lucky, things might happen that way for you. But the reality of dating and relationships is typically a lot less fairytale-esque than that. By the time a woman switches to sugar daddy dating, she’s generally been thoroughly educated on the fact that real-life relationships are nothing like the fictional ones you see in the movies.

That’s why many rich sugar daddies and empowered sugar babies choose to do things the other way around. They choose a partner based on logic and compatibility, consciously decide to commit, and let love take care of itself later. But how well does this actually work, and is it an approach that’s right for you?

There’s No Such Thing As A Perfect Relationship

The problem with the whole idea of soulmates is that it’s just not realistic. To begin with, it implies that there’s only one right sugar daddy for every sugar baby. It also suggests that if someone is in the right relationship with the right person, there won’t be any conflict whatsoever.

In actuality, though, all relationships include conflict and require compromise to some extent. And yes, that means all relationships also require the two parties involved to settle at least a little bit. Finding lasting love is more about finding someone whose idiosyncrasies are compatible with yours than anything else.

There Are Reasons Why Arranged Marriages Last Longer

Although arranged marriages are virtually unheard of in most of the western world, they’re simply how commitment works for around half of the world’s people. They also come attached to an extremely low divorce rate, and it’s not necessarily because people are just better and happier if they’re from somewhere else.

It’s because they take commitment seriously and see it as a final decision in life, so they’re more dedicated to making things work. They also have a better understanding of the fact that love is something that forms over time, as opposed to something to wait around for before committing is even part of the picture.

No, no one’s saying modern sugar babies and sugar daddies should adopt this same approach, hoping for the best. But it may well be worth considering the benefits of making a match based on practical compatibility instead of feelings that may or may not change.

Every Relationship Takes Work

Although some relationships are definitely easier than others, every relationship takes a lot of work – even those so-called soulmate connections that make someone the envy of all their friends. Even people who wholeheartedly love each other will eventually hurt one another. They’ll say things they don’t mean and make mistakes – probably repeatedly.

But when you’ve chosen the right person, the work it takes to keep a relationship happy and strong feels worth doing. It also sounds infinitely better than rolling the dice and starting from scratch again with someone else every single time something about a relationship isn’t a total walk in the park.

Sugaring Is Already Compatible With This Approach

There’s already one fundamental way sugar babies differ from other women regarding their approach to dating. They’ve usually already been there, done that, and decided not to buy the t-shirt when it comes to traditional dating. And they’re tired of the whole merry-go-round effect that comes with bouncing from one delusional connection to another.

Sugar daters already tend to have a much more realistic view of dating and relationships, in general. That’s why both people lay their expectations, needs, and wants out there on the table right in the beginning – so there’s no room for assumption and a much lower likelihood of disappointment later.

Yes, sugar relationships are genuine relationships in every sense of the world, and there often is a healthy dose of chemistry involved. But the decision to get involved on a deeper level is based on so much more, particularly common sense and actual compatibility.

So can love, as most people define the term, actually follow commitment? Of course, it can, and that’s often the smarter way to go about things in the first place. Before you can build your dream house, you need a good plot of land and a firm foundation to support it.

True compatibility, similar needs, and a common attitude toward commitment in the first place can provide that foundation. From there, it’s all too easy for true love to bloom, grow, and blossom.